so kiss me and smile for me

after taking a long, long walk and indulging in good food, felt slightly better.

it's been long since i gave some quality time to myself. i missed the occasional me-time i allocate to myself when i was still alone a few years back - not having to wait for someone else, not having to worry if i'm taking up too much of someone's time, not worrying that if someone is waiting too long for me....

why were the good old days gone so fast? why could the simple pleasures no longer please me as much as it did merely a few years ago?

growing up is a painful thing. we all get more complicated as we get tainted by the outside world and harsh realities. can simple life and simple pleasures ever take place again?

just when i thought everything is going fine, just when i was about to accept things, life has to disappoint me. i guess we all have to accept that our lives is never in a state of equilibrium.

i guess you win some and you lose some all the time. i landed myself a good job which allowed me to continue my studies, but i lost some other good stuff in my life.

my life should be in a crisis now. but why do i not feel it? instead i feel an extraordinary sense of peace. does this means i've 看透人生 or is it simply the peacefulness before a dreary storm befalls?

but one thing i guess i've been right all along - nothing lasts forever. only i have the means to reach my own expectations. even when i fall short of that, i'm always more ready to forgive myself than when someone else fails me.

is that the sad truth individualists have to accept throughout their lives?

(highly random piece of entry which reflected my highly random state of mind)

JAC.jac

- 7:19 PM